Can't fight yet can't die...

I just want to die.

I seriously wish I had the pain threshold to cut my arm until I bleed and pass out from blood loss. I wouldn't mind if I died.

But I know that would hurt so many people. But I'm all alone! M best friend and I aren't friends anymore and it's all my fault. I thought we would always be friends, but now....

If I can't trust the one thing I thought would always be there, then what's left? It's not like I'm little miss social butterfly here.

I just want the pain and suffering to stop! Or at the least slow down! Is it too much to ask for someone to be there and not reject me for who I am? Is that too fucking much to ask? I don't think it is, but apparently I am nothing more than a friendless pervert at the moment.

And another thing: I am keeping the FML on my arm.

-Katie